CREATIVE WRITING
"We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars." - Oscar Wilde
A place I go where I feel the drum punch my solar plexus, strums of guitars rattle my rib cage, strobes and lasers and disco lights catch my eyes at the same time. The voice of an idol making the lights blur, as though I were driving on I-95, fast in the rain. With those hot tears streaming down my screaming face, I am helpless to the song and feel my entire body jumping and bobbing to its every beat. My entire heart is given to being an empty face in the crowd.
The Justin Bieber concert. Justin’s concert was not just a concert for me; it was a revelation. I walked into the big room full of people, freezing. My sister and I found our seats quickly, and when PURPOSE came up on the big screen, a young girl’s shirt caught my eye. It was a Justin Bieber tour shirt that said on the back, “Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is God’s PURPOSE that prevails.” I repeated this over and over in my head until the video ended. In seconds, my idol, role model, favorite singer and celebrity, my encouragement and inspiration was descending from the ceiling, his angelic voice gracing my ears with its unflawed sound. Justin’s show did not stop making me emotional; he got close enough to our side of the stage that I could see his scruff. I felt a flutter in my chest, but also a discomforting dizziness. I constantly felt this during the summer of 2016. I tried to ignore it, that is, until Justin sang what would eventually be my recovery song, “Life is Worth Living.” He sang, “What I get from my reflection is a different perception…” and I nearly fell to my knees in the crowd. I knew, and was finally willing to admit, that I was suffering terribly from anorexia nervosa. Justin kept singing and summoning the tears to my eyes. As soon as the concert started, it was coming to an end. I dragged my feet out of the Boardwalk Hall, along with my screaming stomach. Something clicked inside of my malnourished body that night and, once leaving the concert wrapped in my new BIEBER sweatshirt, I knew I needed to get help for my problem.
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About the author.I love creative writing, especially poetry and short narratives. I hope expand my career as a poet and to always be reading something. Archives
April 2019
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